One painting can be a long journey. Two or three projects represent lifetimes in artist years. Think dog years and multiply by umpteen.
Showing so much in one show is in turns a happy blessing and an emotional Wurlitzer.
Here is a typical adjectival mapping from 'offer of space' to 'a walk in the park'.
Low blood pressured
How you would feel if you just swallowed an egg-sized diamond
Amazed at all the work I apparently did/do
Four days later I take a walk in Pruhonice park,
A 5 minute intake of breath,
I exhale for 2 full hours and then I find my bearings,
A good start to the year,
Now the work beginsagains...
Cows effortlessly achieve cowness.
Humans however are constantly striving to be human.
This feeling of just 'being' only comes to me in flashes. The rest of the time I am actively convincing myself to ignore the desire to make myself more human than I already am!
Today, all day I have felt human and it's thanks to Hagai Segev, Eugen Roden , Eva Mahler, Lir Segev, Jiri Piskac (aka George Whistler), Tomas Sykora, the Red Dot and everybody who came to the show, filled the place with such positive, light energy, hung around, chatted, drank and gave such rewarding and gratifying feedback. And a special thanks to all those who stuck with me to the bitter end in the Magic Bar!
I woke the day after the show on a bookshelf under a friend's parka and I thought "How fitting."
The emotion came after that same friend coffeed me and I had jumped a tram to find some greasy food cure.
I was listening to the 'Lincoln' album by They Might Be Giants and I felt a neck bubble of relief tears accumulating! Never happened before. Now it was happening in public. I arrived at the mall and headed straight to the WC to lock myself in a cubicle and alternately laugh at myself and blubber, laugh at myself and blubber. I still had my headphones on so I did not have to listen to myself sniffling in a public bathroom. It felt weirdly good.
Usually I consciously block the whole drama of actually weeping out of a fear of embarrassing myself over something not as worthy of crying about as something really really cryworthy. Since this seemingly came from nowhere and for no particular reason I felt obligated to let it flow. It may be years before this happens again, which would be a shame.
My unbiased, unselfconscious human tricked me into accepting myself as I was right then. I hope we stay in touch!
In the lead up to the Vernisaz I was reminded that the part I look forward to most when I know I have an exhibition, or any kind of public performance, is the morning after the exhibition when I will know how everything went.
Now I know what happened and I am looking forward to sitting alone in the gallery space and seeing all the paintings in their natural habitat; in the place where I had intended them to be when I first laid hands on them. In doing so I hope to catch a glimpse of where to head with my next paintings.
Click on picture for YouTube link to song - 'Gotta Start All Over' George Whistler
Jiri played some beautiful songs but finished with one which really struck home - "How to play the game no one understands - How to be a lucky man, Oh Lucky man"
I certainly am.
Now to start all over again...
Exhibition 'Everything is a Metaphor for Everything Else' is on until the 27th of Feb at GALERIE HALA C, Drahobejlova 15, Prague 9(entrance from no. 12 Lihovarská Street, through the courtyard )Mon - Sun: 15:00 - 19:00
I will be giving an artist talk in the form of a discussion with curator Hagai Segev on Tuesday 19th at 6pm in the gallery. See you there :-)
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